Prolly no one but Jen will read this anyway.

Posted by Anthem at 4:26am Sep 6 '11
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But Jen, look at the horror I was just put through. Poetry writing class.

RULES. All in one poem.
1. Begin the poem with a metaphor. (The example she gave was a simile, which anyway led to a discovery that a simile is a form of metaphor, who knew.)
2. Say something specific but utterly proposterous.
3. Use at least one image for each of the five senses, either in succession or scattered randomly throughout the poem.
4. Use one example of synesthesia.
5. Use the proper name of a person and place.
6. Contradict something you said earlier in the poem
7. Change direction or digress from the last thing you said.
8. Use a word (slang?) that you've never seen in a poem.
9. Use an example of false cause-effect logic.
10. Use a piece of "talk" you've actually heard (preferably in a dialect and/or which you don't understand.)
11. Create a metaphor using the following construction: "The (adjective) (concrete noun) of (abstract noun)...
12. Use an image in such a way as to reverse its usual associative qualities.
13. Make the persona or character in the poem do something he/she could not do in "real life".
14. Refer to yourself by nickname and in the third person.
15. Write in the future tense, such that part of the poem seems to be a prediction.
16. Modify a noun with an unlikely adjective.
17. Make a declarative assertion that sounds convincing but that finally makes no sense.
18. Use a phrase from a language other than English. (hehe mine says "I want to eat fish") :P
19. Make a nonhuman object say or do something human (personification).
20. Close the poem with a vivid image that makes no statement, but that "echoes" an image from earlier in the poem.


All of these in one poem. So anyway, here's the stupidest poem ever. I went in order so you can see what each line is..the only one I combined was the last sense line about the pores. Combined smell with synesthesia. So give it a shot if you want to write something totally ridiculous.

Here's my stupid poem.

Stupidest poem ever.


Decision is a lightning storm
Poetry is not a glass stone made of wood.
Slurred tongues salt wounded buds
Thunder crashes crescendos in my home.
Bent vision, blunders [private]s.
Odiferous words drain from my pores.
I am bored in Nauru with Macy.
Everything is easy and calm and made of Wood.
When I talked to her she said she wouldn’t like-
Mon Cher!
This love makes the night dangerous.
“Bonne nuit, mes petits mâchoirons.” he said. I walked along in confusion.
The molten lithograph of bedlam bewilders.
Moons, dull under carpet linings sorrow the sky.
She tumbles skillfully ousting the stars.
Her “Darlin’ ” does not like the beat of her rapture.
It will come to pass that candid thought limits the aptitude of her ability.
Stimulating carnage sails on.
There is no doubt that the Tigress had fallen upon the nimble scrawls.
“ Balıklar yemek isterim.”
Lather marks the time with its clock and states the seasons in order of ingenuity.
Provoked waves, rhythm jargon.


the stupid symbols are " "